Troy made his way carefully down the stairs to the basement. He could feel Trixie brushing alongside his leg as he took one step at a time. He was carrying a tray with Jayden’s lunch. Once he reached the bottom, he grabbed the golden retriever’s collar as she led him across the recreation room to Jayden’s bedroom.
Trixie had somehow instinctively sensed that her beloved master was having difficulty seeing. She had never been trained as a guide dog, but she obediently stayed beside Troy as he made his way along the house. She was also picking up Troy’s commands of where he wanted to go. “Jayden,” was a command which was becoming very familiar to her.
She led him across the room and nudged the door open with her nose. “Can I come in?” He waited until he heard Jayden sit up in bed.
“Yeah.” He couldn’t see the smile on Jayden’s face. “Come on in.” Troy carried the tray over and held it in front of Jayden. “What’s this?” He asked as he took the tray and examined it.
Troy replied, “Chicken noodle soup.”
He sat on the side of the bed as Jayden laughed. “Chicken noodle soup? I thought you gave that to people who had a cold?”
“It was the only thing I could find,” Troy replied. Jayden laughed again as his face reddened. “I had to open three cans until I found it. I don’t think you’d have liked the others.”
“What were they?” Jayden again laughed as he pictured Troy in the kitchen opening cans from the cupboard. Since his parents had both returned to work and Penny had gone back to school, they were left alone during the day. The doctor had ordered Jayden to stay home from school for a week until his shoulder had time to completely heal.
No decision had yet been made what to do when Jayden returned to school, and Troy would be left alone during the day. Mrs. Neal was insisting on hiring a maid so Troy wouldn’t be alone, but he had objected strongly. “All you want is a babysitter for me!” he shouted the last time the subject came up.
“Refried beans, I think,” laughed Troy. “And I’m not sure what the other can was. It could have been Trixie’s dog food.” Jayden again started laughing.
“I could have gotten up and fixed us something for lunch,” he said.
“It’s only been three days,” Troy replied worriedly. “You heard the doctor. He didn’t want you doing anything for at least five days.”
“I feel fine,” he assured Troy. “Really.” He pulled back his shirt and examined the wound. It was still red and puffy, but it appeared to be healing quickly. As he looked at it, he realized just how lucky he had been. If Tyrone had been using a higher caliber gun, he might not have been sitting beside Troy holding a bowl of steaming chicken noodle soup.
He quietly sipped at the soup as he watched Troy, who appeared deep in thought. “What?” he finally asked.
“What, what?” Troy asked innocently.
“I can tell when something is bothering you.” He placed the tray on the table beside the bed.
“Nothing is wrong with me,” Troy insisted as he rose from the bed and reached for Trixie’s collar. “Piano, Trixie!” he said harshly as she started to lead him from the room.
Jayden got out of bed and dressed as he listened to Troy playing the piano. The music was slow and sorrowful, almost like a dirge. He walked barefooted into the room, leaned against the door and watched as Troy ran his fingers masterfully over the keys.
After listening for a minute, he quietly tiptoed over to the bench and stood behind Troy. Troy tilted his head but continued playing. His body stiffened when Jayden placed his hands on his shoulders.
“That’s beautiful,” Jayden said as he gently caressed his shoulders. “What is it?”
“Something by Wagner,” Troy responded as he leaned forward to indicate he didn’t want Jayden to touch him.
When Jayden sat down beside him, he scooted so that their bodies weren’t touching. “Penny said you were playing the piano almost before you could walk.”
“Yeah,” he replied as he dropped his hands down on the keys. “It’s about the only thing I can do anymore.” He started playing the piece he had been playing earlier.
Jayden started to laugh. “Can’t you play something a little more...um...” he paused briefly, “cheerful?”
“How’s this, then,” Troy responded sarcastically. He started singing, “The sun will come out tomorrow, bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow, there will be sunshine.” He suddenly stopped and then began banging the keys on the piano. When he started to get up, Jayden grabbed his arm.
“Don’t go,” he pleaded as he pulled Troy back. He then put his arm around him and held him. Troy rested his head on Jayden’s shoulder and began to cry softly.
“Why, Jayden?” he cried mournfully. “Why?”
“I don’t know,” Jayden said soothingly as he rubbed Troy’s back. “Maybe someday you’ll have an answer for why this happened to you.” Troy lifted his head and looked tearfully in Jayden’s direction.
“I’m not talking about me,” he cried. He threw his arms around Jayden and clutched him tightly. “I’m talking about you.”
Jayden hugged Troy tightly and then lifted his head. He wiped the tears from Troy’s face and then leaned in and kissed him gently. He expected Troy to pull away, but he pressed his lips firmly to Jayden’s and kissed him passionately.
After a minute, Jayden pulled away and looked into Troy’s face. “I love you,” he whispered softly before kissing him gently again. Troy returned the kiss and then laid his head on Jayden’s shoulder and sighed.
“I can’t say it yet, Jayden,” he said sadly. “Give me some time, okay?” Jayden kissed him again.
“Take as much time as you need,” he smiled, knowing Troy couldn’t see it. He was just happy that he was beginning respond to him. “Just get used to me saying it.” Troy nodded and returned the kiss.
It felt good to be held again. When he began a relationship with Will a few months earlier, it had taken him a few weeks to begin to enjoy Will’s affectionate behavior. It was one of the things he had been missing. As with Will, he still wasn’t sure if it was love he was feeling or just his overactive teenage glands.
But for now, he had decided that he was going to give Jayden a chance and see if it did lead somewhere. He was tired of walking down the dark path alone. If Jayden was willing to walk with him, then he knew he had to make an attempt.
Jayden was still kissing him when he felt his hand slip inside his shirt. He jumped when Jayden started to lightly squeeze his nipple.
“Oh, God,” he moaned when Jayden lifted his shirt and began licking his chest. He grabbed Jayden’s hand when he reached lower and pressed his hands to the front of his shorts.
“No,” he insisted as he pulled Jayden’s hand away. Jayden leaned in and kissed him again.
“Why?” Jayden moaned as he once again reached down and began rubbing the front of Troy's shorts. He started laughing into Troy’s mouth when Trixie rose from the floor and nudged his hand.
“I just can’t,” Troy insisted.
“Why?”
“I can’t tell you,” Troy replied like a young child. Jayden sat back and laughed.
“Are you a virgin?” He laughed louder when Troy’s face brightened. “I thought that you and Will were dating?”
“We were,” muttered Troy. “Just because we dated didn’t mean we were having sex.”
“Why not?” Jayden asked. “You never played around?”
“Well, yeah,” Troy admitted. “But we never really had actual sex.”
“Why?”
“If I tell you, you’ll laugh,” Troy responded with a childish voice.
“No, I won’t.” Jayden insisted.
“I know you will,” replied Troy, “but I’ll tell you anyway. I wanted to wait until I graduated. I wanted to give myself to Will as a graduation present.”
Jayden leaned in and kissed Troy. “I think that is the sweetest thing I’ve ever heard anyone say.”
Troy pulled away. “Really?”
“Of course,” responded Jayden. “Will would have been a lucky guy.”
“Yeah, well,” replied Troy sadly before Jayden’s lips pressed against his. He felt Jayden reach down and play with the zipper, eventually unfastening it and opening his shorts.
“Jayden,” he grabbed his hand, but he didn’t attempt to remove it. “We should stop.”
“I don’t want to,” moaned Jayden.
“Come on.” He pulled Troy to his feet. He looked down at Trixie and ordered her to stay. He then led Troy into his bedroom. He sat him on the side of the bed and then resumed kissing him.
Troy pulled him away. “I really think we should wait.”
“For what?” Jayden asked. “You said you weren’t going to attend graduation, so why can’t we do something now.”
Troy sighed. “It was always my dream to give up my virginity on graduation night. I know it sounds silly, but it was what I really wanted.”
Jayden reached down and grabbed his hand. “Then you’ll have to attend graduation.”
Troy gasped. “I can’t do that. Look at me, I’m blind.”
“So? That shouldn‘t stop you from getting the diploma you earned.” Jayden kissed his nose. “Besides, I’ll be there too.”
Troy sighed deeply. “Let me think about it, all right?”
Jayden again reached down and tried to open Troy's shorts. "I'll give you something to think about."
“No, Jayden! I want to wait until graduation night. All right?”
“Promise?” Jayden watched Troy nod his head.
“Sure you want to wait until May?” Jayden leaned forward and kissed Troy.
“Yeah, I‘m sure,” he laughed. “Graduation night.”
Jayden kissed him more passionately. Troy rolled his body on top of Jayden, and they made out for several more minutes.
They were startled when Trixie nudged the door open and ran barking into the room. Before they could pull away, they heard Claire’s voice.
“Hey guys,” she shouted as she walked through open the bedroom door. A second later, they heard a scream and then footsteps running up the stairs. Both boys fell back on the bed and began laughing uproariously.
“I guess she caught us having quality time,” Jayden laughed.
“What?” Troy had a puzzled look on his face.
Jayden leaned in and gave him a quick kiss. “I’ll explain later.”
********
Troy was nervous as he entered the large auditorium where graduation was being held. He gripped the sleeve of Jayden’s graduation gown tightly. Even though he had attended the graduation practices, he still felt uneasy knowing that he was going to be the center of attention.
He felt someone grab him around the waist and kiss his cheek. “You look wonderful, Troy.” It was Mrs. Connors, his music director. “Are you ready for this evening?”
“I suppose,” he replied nervously. She had insisted that he play Pomp and Circumstance as the seniors marched in. It had been arranged that Jayden would lead him onstage as she introduced him. She had also asked him to perform a solo after the senior president gave her speech. He had reluctantly agreed, but he had told no one what song he was going to sing.
“Just look at you two!” Claire approached with Allison by her side. “Hold still, I have to get a picture.” Jayden turned Troy so that they were facing her. Just before she took the picture, Jayden leaned in and kissed Troy on the cheek.
They chatted excitedly with other seniors. The room was filled with nervous excitement as girls helped each other with the finishing touches on their hair, and boys helped straighten a friend’s crooked tie.
Jayden looked at the clock on the wall. It was 6:35. Only fifteen minutes until he was to take Troy backstage. He looked admiringly at Troy. He had improved so much the past three months. They had been to the mall several times with Claire. Troy seemed to adjust quickly to being out in public. He was even becoming comfortable eating in restaurants, as long as Jayden sat beside him and positioned his food for him.
“I can’t wait to hear what you’re going to sing,” exclaimed Allison. “I still don’t...” Suddenly, everyone became quiet. Troy could sense that something was wrong when Jayden wrapped his hand around his waist and pulled him into his side.
“What’s wrong?”
He couldn’t see the angry looks exchanged between Jayden, Claire and Allison when Will walked up. “Hi, Guys,” he said timidly.
Troy’s body became rigid when he heard his voice. He reached down, grabbed Jayden’s hand and squeezed it.
“Hi, Troy,” Will said almost in a whisper. Troy nodded but didn’t say anything. Will looked nervously into Jayden’s face.
“Can I talk to Troy?” he asked. “Alone?”
Jayden again felt Troy’s body become tense. His face was taut. Jayden looked at Will. “I don’t think it’s a good idea.”
“No,” responded Troy. “I’ll talk to him.” He knew that there had to be some kind of closure to their relationship. He knew that it had been over after the incident, but they still needed to talk.
“Are you sure?” Jayden asked Troy worriedly. Troy nodded and released his hand from Jayden’s. He then extended it to Will. Will took it and led Troy to a nearby corner where they could talk privately. Claire started to move toward them, but Jayden put out his hand and stopped her. “Let them talk,” he insisted.
“If he says something to hurt Troy, I’ll kill him,” she said angrily as she balled up her fists. She looked over and saw Troy and Will talking quietly.
“I’m sorry, Troy,” Will apologized. “I know it was wrong for not visiting you. I really did…”
“I understand,” he interrupted. “I gave it a lot of thought. At first I was hurt.” His mouth turned into a curl. “I won’t tell you some of the names I called you.”
“I can imagine,” Will replied. “It’s probably some of the names I’ve called myself the past few months.”
“But we are young,” Troy said. “I couldn’t expect you to hang around and let me be a burden to you.”
“Troy...” Will interrupted, but Troy again stopped him.
“It’s okay, really,” he said. “I do understand. We dated for a while, and we had some fun, but we weren’t committed to each other.”
“But I still should have...” Troy again stopped him.
“It’s okay,” he said again. “I understand.” He reached for Will and gave him a quick hug. Will nervously looked over at Jayden who was carefully watching their exchange.
Will pulled away and smiled. “He really loves you.”
“Yeah,” Troy responded. “I’m a lucky guy.”
“So you’re happy?”
“Yeah,” he smiled. “I’m happy.” Will gave Troy a hug and kissed his cheek. He looked back over at a watchful Jayden.
“Jayden’s the lucky guy,” he said sadly. He took Troy’s hand and led him back to Jayden. He placed Troy’s hand in Jayden’s and walked away.
“Okay, Ladies and Gentlemen!” Mrs. Connors shouted nervously above the loud chatter. “Line up!” Claire and Allison hugged the boys quickly before Jayden led Troy away.
********
Halfway through the senior president’s speech, Jayden took Troy backstage to get ready to be introduced for his solo. Even he didn’t know what Troy was going to sing. For the past several weeks he had tried to listen to Troy playing the piano for some clue, but most of it was classical music. He assumed that he was going to entertain the audience with a concerto.
Troy stiffened when he heard Mrs. Connor’s voice. “We have a special treat for you this evening. One of our talented musicians has agreed to sing a special song for you. You will remember Troy Neal for his performance earlier this year in the role of Tevye in Fiddler on the Roof.” They could hear loud applause coming from behind the curtain. “Ladies and Gentlemen, I’d like to introduce Troy Neal.” Jayden wrapped his arm around Troy’s arm and led him onstage. They stood quietly for a minute as the audience gave him a standing ovation.
Jayden could feel Troy trembling. He put his hand behind his back and rubbed it gently. “It’s going to be all right,” he assured him. “I’ll only be a few steps away.” Troy reached for Jayden’s hand and squeezed it. When the applause subsided, Jayden led Troy to the piano and helped him sit down. He gave him a reassuring pat on the shoulder before walking backstage and positioning himself so he could closely observe Troy.
Troy sat quietly for a minute as the audience remained silent. He finally cleared his throat and spoke softly into the microphone in front of him.
“As you know,” he started, “My life has changed dramatically the past few months. There was a time when I didn’t think I’d be here tonight.” He paused before continuing. “But as I sit here tonight, I know I’m one of the luckiest people in the world. Through all this, I found out what love really is.” His voice was becoming thick with emotion. Again, he cleared his throat. “I found out how much love my family has for me.” He turned toward the audience. “I don’t know where you are, but I love you Mom, Dad and Penny.”
Mrs. Neal leaned her head on her husband’s shoulder and cried. Mr. Neal found himself wiping tears that were falling gently down his cheeks. Penny grabbed his hand and held it.
“I also discovered what true friendship is.” Again, he looked toward the audience. “Claire and Allison, I love you more than you’ll ever know.” The nearby seniors turned and smiled at the two teary seniors.
Jayden wiped away tears when Troy turned toward him. “And Jayden,” his voice shook with emotion. “I really do love you.” Soft applause filled the auditorium.
He then sat straight and placed his hands on the piano keys. “For my number tonight, I’m going to sing a song I’ve listened to each year since I was a little boy. Tonight, it has a special meaning for me. It's a song from the musical, Carousel. It was composed by Rodgers and Hammerstein.” His fingers ran effortlessly over the keys as he played the introduction. Everyone immediately recognized the song and began to applaud. They quieted when Troy began to sing.
“When you walk through a storm, hold your head up high; and don’t be…” He suddenly stopped singing as his voice started to quiver. Finally, he continued, “And don’t be afraid of the dark.”
Jayden watched backstage as Troy’s shoulders began to shake. Even though he continued to play, it was obvious that he was overcome with emotion. Jayden walked out and sat down beside his distraught friend.
“It’s okay,” he whispered. “I’m here.” He placed his hand on Troy’s thigh and squeezed it. Troy wiped the tears from his eyes and then sat upright and took a deep breath. Jayden smiled when the audience began to applaud encouragingly.
By the time Troy had reached the final bars of the song, everyone was standing and applauding loudly.
“Walk on, walk on, with hope in your heart.
and you’ll never walk alone. You’ll never
walk alone.”
Jayden took Troy’s hand and led him to the center of the stage. Mrs. Connors and Mr. Fallingsworth walked over and hugged him.
“That was wonderful,” exclaimed Mrs. Connors as the applause began to die down. Jayden wrapped Troy’s arm around him and led him offstage. He looked around to make sure no one was watching and then kissed him.
“I love you,” he said softly as he kissed him again.
“I know,” responded Troy. “I love you, too.” He leaned forward and kissed Jayden.
Jayden grabbed his arm and started to head off the stage. “Now let’s go get our diploma,” he said. He looked around to make sure no one was watching before he reached down and felt the front of Troy's graduation gown.
“You’ve got a promise to keep.”
********
Jayden sat in bed with his laptop computer watching Troy’s bare chest rise and fall as he slept beside him. His eyes were filled with tears as he tried to reread the email he was preparing to send to Troy’s parents.
Dear Mom and Dad Neal,
Troy and I are doing well. After three weeks we’ve finally settled into the dorm, and our lives are returning to normal. We’ve made new friends. Troy is having no problem getting around. If I’m not helping him, then someone is always ready to lend a helping hand. He’s extremely happy with the music department here. He has also volunteered to help the drama department with their fall production of Annie Get Your Gun.
The nursing courses seem like they may be difficult for me. I did well in math and science in high school, but I probably should have taken more advanced classes. I can’t thank you enough for helping me get the grants and scholarships to attend school here. I know you keep saying you don’t mind, but I do. I will repay you someday for the financial support you are giving me. It is what my mother would have expected me to do.
I also want to thank you for Troy. His coming into my life has been a blessing. I know it happened under very tragic circumstances, but I can’t imagine my life now without him. Before I met him, my life was going nowhere. I was traveling down a darkened path with no end in sight. Today, I wake up to a beautiful, smiling face. Our love grows stronger every day. I can now see a bright and long road ahead for both of us.
Your other son,
Jayden
Jayden again looked down at Troy’s sleeping figure and through misty eyes hit ‘send.’
THE END
Down a Darkened Path is completed. Did you enjoy the story? I would love to hear from you.
Send comments to: ronyx@themustardjar.com